You deserve to feel joy

Since the beginning of this year, a number of my clients have expressed guilt about their desire to feel joy. In the face of all the suffering they see in the world right now, what gives them the right to want joy in their lives?

You deserve to feel joy. You deserve to feel optimism about your future.

And no, I’m not talking about that “good vibes only” optimism that means having blinders on and ignoring suffering. I’m talking about your right as a human to yearn for a future that includes happiness, connection, love. You deserve those things.

But what about now? Shouldn’t I be taking care of those being targeted by hate? Yes, your care and mutual aid in support of immigrants, trans folks, and other marginalized communities is needed now more than ever. And also, it’s just as imperative that you practice self-care, self-love, and joy.

Your suffering does not make others suffer less. It’s a false belief that joy is a scarce resource, a belief perpetuated by extractive economics and political divisiveness. Joy is contagious, its abundance comes from you connecting to your own and sharing it with others. Especially those that are struggling.

You have my permission (which you don’t actually need): go find your joy.

And if you need support finding your joy during this disheartening and disorienting time, I have recently opened spaces in my coaching practice.

With joy and warmth,
Nat

Go deeper: Watch Pose on Hulu, a beautiful display of the healing power of joy in a marginalized community that faces so much suffering.